The only thing he ever seems to be cable of winning, to be specific. That's the Dutch national championships, obviously. Boogerd has now won his country's national championships three times, which means he's won more national championships than all other races combined. And that Amstel Gold Race seven years ago was kind of a national championships anyway.

But who cares? Just because his fame and popularity might be disproportionate to his ability doesn't mean he doesn't deserve it. Besides, Boogerd deserves his place in cycling history purely on the basis that he's the only rider that gets asked to sign copies of his dental records. All neo-pros should be taught to have a noticeable flaw, us cycling fans find it endearing.

In even better news:

Adrie Visser was 7th in the elite women's race! We couldn't find a report because CyclingNews are disgusting misogynists and we couldn't be bothered Googling for one on a different site, but we reckon that all the other entrants probably just ganged up on her for being too lovely. Seventh place isn't so bad anyway, is it? If anyone has any photographs of her triumphant result, please send them to us.