Our last ever Tour de France update!
Published by Halverde on 7/24/2006 at 10:09.
Was it three weeks already? Hasn't this year's Tour de France just flown by? Maybe they should go and do another lap or something.
Farewell, The Best Tour Ever (tm) -- we barely even knew ye. Of course, we did know it enough to realise that it was only the best Tour ever if you ignored the first ten days of utter tedium and the charmless catenaccio racing on the first three mountain stages. Or rather, it was the best Tour ever if you only include the last five stages. And even then you're including two flat stages and a time trial with a foregone conclusion.
Floyd Landis, the Mennonite Metorite (or the Mennonite Mandible, if you're a message board wag) won The Best Tour Ever (tm) with The Best Solo Breakaway Ever (tm). In fact, it was so good that we had to avoid our friends list and RSS reader just to get a break from all of the shamelessly kneejerk (and grammatically incorrect) posts claiming that Landis is a "legend". We're not even going to mention our thoughts on it all because we got so many stroppy e-mails the last time we dissed Landis.
Damiano Cunego picked up the white jersey and actually increased his lead in the competition during the final time-trial. We've no idea how he managed tenth place in his weakest discipline, but we're sort of glad he did. Sorry Marcus Fothen, but Damiano will always be the number one wunderkind.
Mickael Rasmussen won the polka dot jersey with a fabulous breakaway, and proved he was the best climber in the process. David De La Fuente was admirable in his painful-to-watch pursuit of the jersey, but Rasmussen looks as though he was born to wear it. And given his rather grotesque frame, there's probably very few other things our Mickael actually looks good in.
Robbie McEwen won the green jersey, beating such renouned sprinters as that guy from Lampre and that other fella Krusty Anderson always picks to win. He probably deserves it, but it was still pleasing to see the mighty Thor Hushovd crush him on the Champs Elysées.
And that's it for another year, when we're hoping that somebody a little more aesthetically pleasing will win.
Farewell, The Best Tour Ever (tm) -- we barely even knew ye. Of course, we did know it enough to realise that it was only the best Tour ever if you ignored the first ten days of utter tedium and the charmless catenaccio racing on the first three mountain stages. Or rather, it was the best Tour ever if you only include the last five stages. And even then you're including two flat stages and a time trial with a foregone conclusion.
Floyd Landis, the Mennonite Metorite (or the Mennonite Mandible, if you're a message board wag) won The Best Tour Ever (tm) with The Best Solo Breakaway Ever (tm). In fact, it was so good that we had to avoid our friends list and RSS reader just to get a break from all of the shamelessly kneejerk (and grammatically incorrect) posts claiming that Landis is a "legend". We're not even going to mention our thoughts on it all because we got so many stroppy e-mails the last time we dissed Landis.
Damiano Cunego picked up the white jersey and actually increased his lead in the competition during the final time-trial. We've no idea how he managed tenth place in his weakest discipline, but we're sort of glad he did. Sorry Marcus Fothen, but Damiano will always be the number one wunderkind.
Mickael Rasmussen won the polka dot jersey with a fabulous breakaway, and proved he was the best climber in the process. David De La Fuente was admirable in his painful-to-watch pursuit of the jersey, but Rasmussen looks as though he was born to wear it. And given his rather grotesque frame, there's probably very few other things our Mickael actually looks good in.
Robbie McEwen won the green jersey, beating such renouned sprinters as that guy from Lampre and that other fella Krusty Anderson always picks to win. He probably deserves it, but it was still pleasing to see the mighty Thor Hushovd crush him on the Champs Elysées.
And that's it for another year, when we're hoping that somebody a little more aesthetically pleasing will win.
