With a ride that would have surely inspired millions if Eurosport had come on air early enough to show it, David Millar comfortably (a huge gap of a few miliseconds) won the first time trial of the Vuelta.

Apparently he's recently returned from being banned for two years. Who knew? Luckily, every cycling site and magazine will be on hand to inform you of this fact, as well as making a rubbish pun on the very-out-of-date, only-a-bit-funny-in-the-first-place catchphrase "It's Millar Time."

Whatever. For winning, he was allowed to select two raven haired women from a crowd and have them rub their noses on his cheeks. He certainly looks pleased with it, which isn't surprising since he's been denied any hot nose-on-cheek action for over two years. Well done Dave. We hear the rewards for winning the World's are even better, if that's any incentive.

Yeah, yeah. Image stolen from CyclingNews.com. Now we've gone all anal about copyrights we've been informed that we have to say this whenever we use something that isn't ours, otherwise we risk getting sued and things.